


Some Still Morning

by NexnGrxvstxns



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Angst, Death, Fluff, Friendship, Love, M/M, Sad, joshler - Freeform, soft
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-27
Updated: 2020-10-26
Packaged: 2021-03-08 00:34:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,084
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26686723
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NexnGrxvstxns/pseuds/NexnGrxvstxns
Summary: Life is messy.Some still morning, you'll wake in bedAnd realize it's all worth it in the end.Three friends lives keep intersecting across the years and the States.
Relationships: Jenna Black/Josh Dun/Tyler Joseph, Jenna Black/Tyler Joseph, Josh Dun/Tyler Joseph
Kudos: 8





	1. Funeral (part one)

**Author's Note:**

> This is a really rough work. I just loved the album this was inspired by and wanted to write this story. Check the end for more notes.

He looked at himself in the mirror. Butterflies flitted around in his stomach, and nerves caused his fingers to vibrate. How many years had it been? How many days?

Too few.

He took a deep breath, once again straightening his tie. A knock on his door broke his focus, however, and he turned to see Josh standing there. Tyler took a step towards him, to which Josh mirrored with his own. They chuckled softly, the noise sounding off in the tiny hotel room.

Josh closed the distance between them, straightening Tyler's tie once more for him. He could feel the heat in his cheeks, but tried to brush the surge of emotion away. He stuffed it down, deep inside, where it couldn't come bubbling forth in some great explosion. It'd drown them both, surely.

Tyler fidgeted unconsciously with Josh's own tie, and for a moment time stood tall. It was just the two of them in the tiny hotel room, the outside world be damned. Time could wait. Today could wait. All that mattered was now.

But just as quickly, it was gone.

"Come on," Josh said softly. "We don't want to be late."

He was right, of course. Tyler hesitated, but then nodded, flicking off the light as they left and closing the door with a soft click. He wasn't sure if he was ready for this. Ready to see that face, cold and pale, staring blankly up into the world. But at least Josh was with him. Josh always made him feel like he could handle anything. Even this.

Even this.


	2. Massachusetts

The rain.

The great pacific northwest.

It always rained here, didn't it?

Maybe he should have visited in the summer. Gone back home in the summer with her. It could have been evergreen trees and blue skies, not downpours and petrichor. But there was nothing to be done about that now, not anymore. 

He paused with Josh just inside the hotel, both of them bracing themselves to be soaked through before they made it to the car idling on the sidewalk in front of them. They shouldn't have worried, however, as the driver quickly got out and provided an umbrella for them to huddle under. 

They were off, windshield wipers going full speed. Tyler and Josh sat in the backseat, Josh's hand resting softly atop Tyler's. He was glad, once more, that he was here with him. They were a long way from Ohio, and further still from Massachusetts.

Massachusetts.

He still remembered that night. It was raining then, too. Tyler hadn't been able to sleep. He'd consider waking Josh, but seeing his best friend lying in the bunk next to his... He hadn't been able to wake him from his peaceful slumber.

And so, in the middle of night with a hoodie pulled tightly around him he'd left their tour bus, wandering through the city. He didn't remember how he had found his way down to the subway. Didn't remember where his destination was or when he'd go back. All he could remember was the sound of the empty train, making it's way to Brooklyn. 

It was stupid, taking a three hour ride out of state when they would have to be up the next morning and moving on to their next tour stop. And yet, the flashes of light punctuating the darkness of the empty train was memorizing, in a way. Captivating. It kept him in his seat as the hours passed. And then he was in Brooklyn. Tentative steps led him off the train, cold air biting his face. It was winter, and it could be felt in the air. He had wished that he'd brought a coat. 

He remembered wandering the streets. It had to be two or three in the morning now, but the city was alive in a way it could only be in the dead of night. Neon signs advertised anything and everything imaginable. Store fronts were plastered with flyers, and he could hear some punk rock band's music coming from a venue to his left. He glanced down at his phone. No texts yet. No one knew he was gone. Good.

But maybe he should-

Before the thought had been able to finish flitting across his brain, he was on his backside. Wet ice seeped into the bottom of his jeans, causing a flush of red to cross over his face. A woman stared wide-eyed down at him, an apologetic smile on her face. He could tell by the way her mouth curved that she was holding back laughter.

"I'm sorry," she apologized. "I didn't see you. I swear, I am the clumsiest!" 

She held out her hand, still smiling. He was struck by two things as he grabbed it and stood up. Her hair was a brilliant blond, and her accent wasn't that of a native New Yorker. 

He smiled back. "It's fine, I should have been watching where I was going." He glanced around quickly, his eyes landing on a bar to the right. A neon sign flashed above, like some sort of beckoning sin.

"Let me buy you a drink," he offered. She glanced at him, perplexed.

"At three in the morning?" She questioned.

"Well, we're both out wandering the streets," he offered. 

"I hardly know you."

"Which is exactly why you should let me buy you a drink. Come on, I owe you."

She smirked at him, and he began to wonder if he'd pushed too hard. But then she slowly nodded, following him into the bar. "What's your name?"

"Tyler, and yours?"

"Jenna."

She was from Ohio, like him. She was studying at a local university, but wouldn't tell him for what. He told her he was visiting on business, but was vague on the specifics. He figured it wasn't the best idea to explain he was in a famous band on the first date.

They talked for hours in that crowded bar. About life, music, cooking, how terrible their drinks were, and much, much more. They drank more than they should have, egged on by each other's company. And suddenly, there were heading outside the city, wandering some bridge. Their faces flushed in the moonlight, shadows carving strange shapes on both their faces. 

He remembered pausing at the center of the bridge, looking up towards the stars. 

He remembered how she closed the distance between them.

He remembered her kissing him. Softly, tentatively, and then with more confidence.

And then it was over.

"I... I should get back," Tyler said. They were still close, and he could just barely make out her flushed cheeks, her sparkling eyes. 

She smiled softly, sadly almost. "Of course," she whispered. "Do you think we'll ever meet again, Tyler with-no-last-name?"

He chuckled softly, pulling off a piece of red tape he'd fashioned into a makeshift ring. It had been a lot easier than wrapping his finger with red tape every night. "Here," he whispered, just as softly.

He carefully placed the ring on her finger. "A reminder of tonight. Someday we'll meet again, I'm sure."

He remembered leaving her there, standing in the moonlight, a makeshift ring of red tape on her hand.


	3. Weeds (part one)

He stared around the house. It was big. Too big, in some ways. He could hear Josh in the other room, humming some new Paramore song. He should be unpacking, like Josh was, but instead he was sinking into the bed of the master bedroom. How did time change everything so quickly? What was the magical moment that changed everything? Would it last?

He looked around the room. There was nothing up yet. Nothing to suggest that this home was his. Nothing to suggest Josh would be crashing on the couch. Or that he'd be sitting down in the basement, working on new music with him. The basement still needed to be remodeled to a studio, but that could wait. It all could wait. 

He got up, wandering back through the house until he found Josh, sitting on a barstool in the kitchen. He stared down at a photograph, a small grin on his face. Tyler paused for a moment, just letting the moment wash over him... Letting Josh wash over him. What had he done to deserve him? Any of this?

He took a step towards Josh, the floorboards creaking under his feet giving his presence away. Josh glanced up, that grin still there. He tilted the photo towards him, and he could finally see what it was - The last tour photo with Michael, all their fans in the background. Tyler smiled too. He remembered how happy they were that day. How much fun the show had been, and their afterparty to celebrate Michael's retirement... It had been perfect.

Josh stood then, grabbing Tyler's hand and silently leading him outside. "Where are we going?" Tyler asked.

"Just, follow me," Josh sighed. Tyler could tell from his demeanor that he wasn't frustrated, though. In fact, he seemed perfectly at peace. Happy. Yes, they were happy. Even with everything going on, they were happy.

Josh stopped suddenly, and Tyler looked around. He hadn't even realized that Josh had led him out past the rest of the houses, to a small wooded area. Before he could even ask where they were, Josh was on the ground, hands behind his head.

Tyler glanced around, marveling at the tiny clearing that Josh had found. Shrugging, Tyler slowly got down besides Josh, placing his hands on his chest and staring up into the trees canopy, and the blue sky beyond. The clearing wasn't exactly maintained, and the weeds rustled around them, pressing softly into their backs.

They laid in the silence, just existing in this moment. There was still so much to do. Finish unpacking, remodel the basement, and then pitch the new record idea to Fueled by Ramen... but for today, for this moment, they could rest. Tyler glanced at Josh, taking in his side profile, his hair - just beginning to curl again, and the bleached blond fading out. He liked it, Josh's natural hair. He liked it dyed, of course he did - but his natural hair... It suited him, somehow.

He smiled to himself, he couldn't help it. Something stirred in his stomach, a feeling he didn't recognize. A sense of ease fell over him. It was always like this with Josh. He just always made him feel... right.

"It's beautiful, isn't it?" Tyler started, Josh's question surprising him. He was still looking up at the sky, the trees swaying softly in the breeze. Had he seen him looking at him? Had he seen the smile? Had he seen the way his face had opened up to show such vulnerability. Had he seen the way he looked at Josh, the way a person looks when they are...

He quickly looked back up to the sky. "Yes," Tyler said softly. "It is."


	4. Weeds (part two)

They lay there in the weeds for a long time, staring up between the trees to the sky above. Neither of them moved, perhaps both secretly afraid that if the other were to move, the silent beauty that surrounded them would be broken. So they stayed as they were, lying in the weeds and watching the sky turn a slow shade of pink. At last Tyler glanced at Josh, the sunlight filtering through his hair and eyelashes, casting golden light and shadow across his face. He smiled again to himself. 

Josh cracked open an eyelid, a slow, lazy smile creasing his face. He stretched, slowly sitting up. Tyler followed suit. "I guess we fell asleep."

Tyler nodded. Josh was still smiling. He'd seen him smiling earlier, and he must have seen him smiling just then. It was just a smile, though. They were friends. Friends smiled when together. It was fine.

"Come on," Josh held his hand out. Tyler glanced up, surprised. He hadn't even noticed that Josh had stood up. He took his hand feeling his face grow red as he allowed Josh to help him stand. 

They walked back to the house in silence. It grew dark quickly, but it didn't bother them much. They'd both grown up in Ohio, and it wasn't hard to navigate - even if this neighborhood was one that they'd only dreamed of living in. 

Life had certainly taken a crazy turn, hadn't it? They were successful enough now to live in big houses and help their families live happily. Josh had talked about moving to California. Tyler couldn't stand the idea - Ohio had always been home... But Josh was also his home. He'd tried to not let the idea bother him, they were still in a band together, after all. It wasn't like him moving away would be the end of their friendship. They'd still see each other plenty often. It just didn't feel right that after Tyler finished moving into this new place, Josh would be on his way to the golden state.

They entered the house, flicking switches on as they went through the room. They both froze as they entered the kitchen. It was one of the rooms that had yet to be unpacked when they had left, but now several of Tyler's pots and pans were out, and three plates sat on the counter. Josh glanced at Tyler, raising a silent eyebrow.

Jenna walked around the corner, a smile on her face. "There you two are. I was worried I was going to have to put this in the fridge. Come on, sit down and eat - it's still hot."

Tyler smiled, grabbing a seat at one of the stools she must have pulled out. Josh grabbed another and sat beside him, Jenna sitting on the other side.

"I didn't expect you until tomorrow," Tyler began. Jenna blushed.

"I wanted to surprise you two. Plus I figured it was about time I showed off what I've been learning." She smiled.

"So you're a chef!" Josh exclaimed. Tyler chuckled. 

"The mystery is finally solved," Tyler remarked with a grin. 

Jenna smiled back. "I wasn't about to tell you I was going to school to be a chef the night we met. Just like _you_ didn't tell me you were in a band." 

After that night all those years ago, they'd met up a few more times, even once at a black tie party. All three of them had hit it off, and had remained friends throughout the years. Tyler had eventually gotten her number, but it had taken several tries calling her school to convince her to give it to him. He'd let it slip he was the "twenty one pilots guy", and had invited her to one of their Canadian shows that was closer to her campus. 

They'd been dating ever since.


	5. Christmas in Jersey

With Jenna's help, they had unpacked Tyler and enjoyed a few days of housewarming activities and general friend companionship. It ended far too quickly, though, and soon Jenna was moving back to Massachusetts for school. Josh left a few days later, getting ready to move to California. Josh promised that he would visit, and make use of Tyler's offer to crash on the couch, but he still couldn't shake the empty feeling that came with both of their departures. 

Time passed. The last bit of summer slipped away and transformed into fall. September slid by slowly, even slower with the adjustment to being alone. Even Jenna was distant, but that, he reasoned, was both of their faults. They'd broken up just before she'd moved back to Massachusetts to finish school. It had been both of their decisions, in the end. They'd both thought it best to allow the other to find people who were closer, to not try to force a long-distant relationship when they were both so busy. Their lives were just beginning to change.

Sometime in October, Jenna texted to tell him she'd met a guy. It was short. _I've met someone. His name is Will. He wants me to meet his family, so I'll be spending Christmas in Jersey._

And that was that.

Winter came quickly, and with it Ohio frost, and the first snow of the season. He watched it from his bedroom window. He and Josh had been sending demos back and forth, trying to get something to stick, but so far nothing sounded right. 

He pulled on a beanie and headed to the attic. There were only a few things up here, but it badly needed some dusting. He'd meant to do it in the fall, but then he was distracted with trying to nail down the new record. Josh would be arriving in Ohio a few weeks from now to visit family for Christmas. Tyler was hoping that if his best friend was there with him, they'd be able to get some music finished.

He wandered around the attic, cracking open old boxes. Old basketball trophies. A few old music awards. A stack of postcards. He pulled them out, sitting down on the floor and flipping through them.

_Tyler,  
My professor says I'm an excellent student, and will make an excellent chef! Soon enough you'll have your very own personal caterer for your concerts. I'll be sure to give you a discount.  
jenna _

She'd always sign her name in lowercase. He smiled softly.

_Jenna,  
That's amazing! I already know what my first order will be: A ham and cheese sandwich with mayonnaise, mustard, and crushed Doritos. I think I've really hit a stroke of genius with this. Let me know if this'll be possible.  
Tyler _

_Tyler,_  
I could make that work. It is certainly an... interesting choice. Per your request, one ham and cheese sandwich with mayonnaise, mustard, and crushed Doritos will be yours next time we see each other. I'm thinking Christmas?  
jenna 

He sighed, setting the postcards back into the box. They were all memories of another time. He'd told all his friends, Josh included, that this would last. That maybe she was the one. Wasn't she? He'd cared about her, yes. He'd even loved her.... But he couldn't shake the way he'd felt when he had seen Josh lying in the weeds with him. Or any of the other times that they'd been together, really.

It was too confusing.

He sat there, thinking, for a long time. He couldn't reconcile his feelings for Josh. They were too confusing. But he did know he didn't just want to be a postcard from the past. He wanted to be something more. He wanted to be Jenna's friend. He wanted her back.

**Author's Note:**

> Commissioned piece by Lua James.
> 
> Inspiration for this fic came from Handsome Ghost's new album, "Some Still Morning".


End file.
